Reflections.

So biology lecture test didn't go as well as I thought it would be - 8.5/40, which is like 20%?
No, I'm kidding myself. I didn't even study for it; why should I even expect it to turn out well?

And then, chemistry lecture test was 10.5/30, another crap result which is a complete opposite reflection of my ability in chemistry (I hope).

This recent turn of events really made me think. I believe it is my fault, it has to be my fault. I had given up on myself, let myself down by not studying, by not going the extra mile, by not squeezing out every effort in me. I wouldn't even try to blame anyone else, other than myself. My attitude was reprehensible.

My garbled scripts were littered with misconceptions and futile attempts to cover up the gaps of knowledge. After re-reading what I wrote, I found my answers pathetic. It is definitely not the time to be ascetic and tell myself that 'I still have one more year to make up for it.' After being contrite, it is time to pick myself up and work hard towards infinity.

Why? Because I don't lack inspiration, just lacking in the motivation department.